settle down settle down, my desire. (msstink) wrote,
settle down settle down, my desire.

you asked me. and i still cared, so i told you. it's strange how attached i sometimes become to people who pass through my life quickly, who are never constants and who i can't really even say that i particularly miss. but not missing someone doesn't always equal not caring, and i reached a point a while back where i thought of you fondly, and sometimes i was confused by how quickly you betrayed me, how you didn't even take a week to mull it over or make a pros and cons list or...think. maybe grad school brains can justify making terrible decisions at a much more rapid speed than the rest of us.
but this time i am much more confused because you did take the time to think. you took the time to write to me and stir a sympathy that you didn't deserve and i told you secrets and i told you i wasn't surprised and i told you the truth. but right now, the only truth that i can think of to say is that i shouldn't have bothered. your complete disregard for the advice of all of us makes me nauseous. i hoped for your happiness and i was pulling for you, but i'm done now. now i'm just glad i'm not you.
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I am so sorry for lurking. I am just recently getting back into Livejournal. You are beautiful and so is your writing ♥
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